Friday, May 9, 2008

Carpe Diem

Note: the original title of this post was changed because I started out with the thought that things were a little dull in life at that moment, but that is not the conclusion I came to; therefore I gave it a more appropriate sounding title indicative of the conclusions I reached- interestingly noted as well by Dr. H in chapel this morning.

My life is boring? I once again came to that conclusion facebook stalking this morning. Maybe I've come to that conclusion during the hours I have spent packing boxes the past week. Going through old clothes, photographs, and memories made me remember how fun I and my life used to be. I made a few poor decisions, but I at least I had decisions to make. I had more opportunity to make the right decision, I suppose, and not have it assumed that everything I did was right... that might be the most ambiguous thing I write this morning. I might make sense of you go to a Christian college.

I do like my life... aspects of it... overall it has been sweet and interesting, in a toursity, hand-sanitizer and bottled water sort of way (I actually love bottled water. Yes, I have requested bottles of Evian for my birthday). But right now, day to day, I've definitely got issues with the lack of happenings around here at Camp Taylor. Yesterday I needed to get away and it was too short notice to grab anyone (I most likely would have been told they don't have any money or were studying anyway) and I went to Kmart to buy tubs and proceeded to spend the next 5 hours packing them. Old McDonald had a dog and LAME-O was his name-o (stole that from Esteban). In all honestly, I am happy, but I feel like I could be doing so much more. And looking so much better. I decided about 5 mins ago to go running every day and get abs before the summer. And then I remembered that there's one week of school left :-P I tend to do things last minute and rushed and they don't turn out as awesome as they could be. I want to work on this too. Like, for the last 3 days I've been in a daze, rationalizing my lazyness as celebrating for finally presenting my senior thesis.

In my freshman year Fit-for-Life (aka one semester) class, the prof said that when one thing in your life is out of wack other things follow until it feels like you have no control over anything. I guess I'm reaching that point. I'm getting to where I think that painting my nails or dying my hair or changing deodorant scents or reading a lot of books or planning a party or drinking lots of tea will fix something... maybe getting away? In the past that had provided a temporary fix to my restlessness. Well, I'm getting to be European soon. For now, I have some boxes to pack...


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