The assignment was to create a timeline that included major events from your life. It was given to 8th graders, who were mainly born in 1998. "Major" events they chose span from the super-disaster in Japan and earthquake in Haiti, to the death of Michael Jackson and when Steve Jobs resigned as CEO of Apple.
Many students chose the election of Barack Obama as a major event. Here are the unedited paragraphs written by two of them.
One:
On November 4th 2008 Barack Obama was elected president of the U.S. Barack Obama became the forty forth and first black president of the U.S. after a long campaign that lasted nine months. He was running as a democratic candidate against republic candidate John McCain, in his campaign he promoted change and hope for the American people and the world. When he got elected he started to make an impact immediately by helping U.S. and British forces in Iraq and making sure everyone in the U.S. got healthcare. He has helped in many global problems such as the Iran Iraq war, the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico and the civil war in Libya. He is currently running for the 2012 presidential election as well. This was a major global event because he has made so much impact on the world and helped so many different nations and not just his own. He has also prevented global disasters such as ordering the death of Osama Bin Laden. He also continues to have new ideas to help the world and make it a better place, which is beneficial for everyone.
Two:
November 2008- a recent event that has shaped the United States was when Barrack Obama was elected president. This was a very historical event for the country because he is the very first African American president. This was not an event that shaped the world but it did shape in some way the United States, because it may encourage other African Americans that want to run for political office. The presidency has been a difficult one for Obama while it has nothing to do with his race, perhaps he was not qualified enough to take on the huge responsibility of being president and the country has since paid the price for his inexperience.
Many students chose the election of Barack Obama as a major event. Here are the unedited paragraphs written by two of them.
One:
On November 4th 2008 Barack Obama was elected president of the U.S. Barack Obama became the forty forth and first black president of the U.S. after a long campaign that lasted nine months. He was running as a democratic candidate against republic candidate John McCain, in his campaign he promoted change and hope for the American people and the world. When he got elected he started to make an impact immediately by helping U.S. and British forces in Iraq and making sure everyone in the U.S. got healthcare. He has helped in many global problems such as the Iran Iraq war, the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico and the civil war in Libya. He is currently running for the 2012 presidential election as well. This was a major global event because he has made so much impact on the world and helped so many different nations and not just his own. He has also prevented global disasters such as ordering the death of Osama Bin Laden. He also continues to have new ideas to help the world and make it a better place, which is beneficial for everyone.
Two:
November 2008- a recent event that has shaped the United States was when Barrack Obama was elected president. This was a very historical event for the country because he is the very first African American president. This was not an event that shaped the world but it did shape in some way the United States, because it may encourage other African Americans that want to run for political office. The presidency has been a difficult one for Obama while it has nothing to do with his race, perhaps he was not qualified enough to take on the huge responsibility of being president and the country has since paid the price for his inexperience.
1 comment:
Well I think the differences in grammatical function speak clearly for the validity of the respective students' views.
Post a Comment